I'm a People Watcher, Which One Are You?

I'm a people watcher.

In public, I love to see what people do, how they act, what they look at, etc. Admittedly, in the last few years most of my public gatherings have centered around children's activities, but I've found that there are a few constant Personalities that seem to pop up wherever a crowd gathers:

The Cackler: The person you can hear no matter where you are in a crowd. They laugh big, hearty laughs that sound as though a small animal is trapped in their throat. They don't actually ever say anything funny, but apparently EVERYTHING everyone else says is HILARIOUS.

The Sweet Old Man: He wears a baseball cap and fought in WWII. He usually chuckles at everything and is foggily clueless about what may actually be going on around him, but in a very sweet way. He might offer any random child a sweet from his pocket, not understanding why parents get all tense about it.

The Hens: They cluck. A lot. They might have come to watch a movie or a child's/grandchild's performance, but never actually see it as they chat chat chat the whole time. Much of their chatting is bragging about said child/grandchild who is desperately waving from the field/stage to get their attention. (I will admit to having hen-ish tendencies from time to time :O).

Mr. Serious: Everything is Serious. The world is one big CONSPIRACY and full of BULLSHIT. May or may not also be a Power Broker (see below) "Goddammit" is frequently heard uttered in their vicinity.

Power Broker: He's a busy, busy, very Important Guy. Cell phone, bluetooth, palm pilot, blackberry and/or laptop may be whipped out at any time. Most common gesture is the hand-up "oooh, just a sec, gotta take this" as he steps away from the crowd.

The MILF: She's hot and she knows it. Will not leave the house without perfect hair, lipstick and D/G shades, stilettos afoot. Pretends to be aloof, but knows EVERYONE is watching and admiring. Comes with or without optional silicone implants and bleach blonde hair. Child/husband is simply another accessory.

The Redneck/WT: Big people, may have many tatooes on various body parts, not all of which should be viewed in public. Mullets optional but preferred. Will give evil eye to anyone who DARES look at their cigarette in a less-than-condoning way.

The Stud: He's hot. He knows it. May or may not be compensating for something with the sportscar and big shorts. Will do everything in his power to hook up with the MILF.

The Social Butterfly: She knows EVERYONE. And MUST say "HI!" to all of them. Cross-introductions take hours but she does it. Big hair and capri pants a must. Has coffee/lunch with someone new every day and is on at least two committees for something.

Quiet One/Outsider: Usually sits slightly apart from the crowd, alone, often with a book or notebook and pen. May periodically try to join a part of the crowd by commenting on something they've said amongst themselves.

So: did I miss any?

Which one are YOU?

Which one do you think I am?

:)